The Heart of the Matter

I heard this song on the radio today. It's an old favorite of mine that caused me to think of all the things that are going on in my life. It's well written and just as pertinent now as it was then.


I got the call today I didn't want to hear
But I knew that it would come
An old true friend of ours was talking on the phone
She said you'd found someone
And I thought of all the bad luck
And the struggles we went through
How I lost me and you lost you
What are these voices outside loves open door
Makes us throw off our contentment and beg for something more

I'm learning to live without you now but I miss you sometimes
The more I know the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew I'm learning again

I've been trying to get down to the heart of the matter
But my will gets weak and my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Even if you don't love me anymore

These times are so uncertain there's a yearning undefined
And people filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
The trust and self assurance that lead to happiness
They're the very things we kill I guess
Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms
And the work I put between us you know it doesn't keep me warm

I'm learning to live without you now but I miss you baby
And the more I know the less I understand
All the things I thought I figured out I have to learn again

I've been trying to get down to the heart of the matter
But everything changes and my friends seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness even if you don't love me anymore

There are people in your life who've come and gone
They let you down you know they hurt your pride
You'd better put it all behind you baby because life goes on
You keep carrying all that anger it'll eat you up inside baby

I've been trying to get down to the heart of the matter
Because the flesh will get weak and the ashes will scatter
So I'm thinking about forgiveness even if you don't love me anymore

- Don Henley

THE TERRIBLY TERRIFYING TORTILLA TALE

13:00 hrs., or 1:00pm- Lunchtime!

I'm sitting in a local Tex-Mex joint in town enjoying a (rarely) quiet lunch with my hyperactive boss. I've just payed for his meal because he left his wallet in his other holster (yeah, riiight).

We're munching on a basket of tortilla chips. You know, the red & yellow kind, bathed in salt, that you can't stop eating, but because of the high salt content you become very thirsty, so you have to order more drinks so the restaurant makes more money off Patsy's like us, when panic struck!

It seems a small piece of a tortilla chip became wedged kinda sideways in my esophagus. It wasn't quite obstructing my airway as I could breath & speak, however I felt a mild panic come over me! Every time I swallowed I felt a very uncomfortable scratching against the inner lining of my throat. I made several attempts to cough to clear my throat, but that didn't work.

I was trying to look cool, calm & collected as I informed my boss of my dire situation. He said I seemed very calm although my leg was goin' a mile a minute! He said to drink lot's of water to loosen the chip piece which I did. Glass after glass after glass. Now not only was I choking, but I had to pee real bad! After what seemed like an hour, it appeared the chip had dislodged itself, or had grown smaller & less irritating because of all the water I drank. I should mention while all this was going on, my boss who was sitting across from me was smiling with glee as he dramatically stuffed chips into his gullet- that SOB!

Obviously I survived the ordeal so I could share it with you now, to gain your deep sympathies. It's about two hours later & every time I swallow my throat hurts, though not too badly. Sometime I'll have to relate my choking on a too large piece of steak when I was all alone working the 12 to 8am shift, but that's a story for another day.

In lieu of flowers please send salsa & water.

A Beautiful Mind

MORE exciting news!

Apparently beauty is in the BRAIN of the beholder. It seems researchers found men process beauty on the right side of their brains, while the ladies use their whole brain.

When women consider a visual object, they link it to language, while most men tend to concentrate on the spatial aspects of the subject or object. At the University of Baleares in Spain, researchers tested 10 men & 10 women, showing them paintings & photos of urban scenes & landscapes. They then asked the participants to rate each scene as either beautiful or not beautiful.

At the same time, researchers looked at images of the magnetic fields produced by electrical currents in the brains of the men & women. For both sexes the most active region was the parietal lobe that deals with visual perception, spatial orientation & information processing, but it was focused on the right side of the brain in men while both sides of the brain participated in women.

Anger Makes Me Mad!

Researchers say anger & other strong emotions can trigger potentially deadly heart rhythms in certain vulnerable people. Doctors at Yale University studied 62 patients with heart disease and implanted heart defibrillators that detect dangerous cardiac rhythms & deliver an electrical shock to restore a normal heartbeat.

Study patients were instructed to recount a recent angry moment or episode while the study team conducted a test that measured electrical instability in the heart. The team then followed the patients for three years to see who among them suffered from cardiac arrest.

The people who had the highest anger-induced electrical instability were 10 times more likely than everyone else to have an arrhythmia in follow up.

Although that's not surprising news, I find that study to be heart breaking and quite honestly it makes me furious. Considering my father, his brother, as well their father, suffered massive fatal heart attacks, I should probably cut back on the french fries & take some deep restorative & meditative breaths. However, in my favor I'm not a smoker nor much of a lush!

In light of this study, I'm gonna switch to an all-donut diet, cut down from a carton to a pack a day, and enroll in an anger management class despite that silly judicial order!

File Under STUPID!

A dimwitted thief shouted from his apartment window that he had robbed a bodega while calling cops "idiots" for grabbing the wrong guy.

Raymond Gramby, 37, allegedly yelled, "it was me you idiots, you have the wrong guy!" as police led an innocent man to the deli where the theft occurred. Gramby had earlier stolen two bottles of liquor & tried to walk out out of the store, but was stopped by the shops owner. Gramby pulled a knife on the owner before fleeing.

Cops followed him to his near-by apartment, but when a different man answered the door, the cops grabbed that guy instead! As the man was led down the street, Gramby opened his window & began his rant to the cops, which lead to him being arrested & charged with robbery, weapon possession & menacing.

- Jamie Schram, NY Post

 (edited by yours truly)

I gotta say, for the most part criminals are stupid idiots who make our jobs much easier! Thanks fellas, now shut up, spread 'em & put your hands behind your back!

Down The Road

This past weekend I saw another film I've been wanting to see for quite some time. This film was "Revolutionary Road", starring Kate Winslet & Leonardo DiCaprio. It was directed by Kate's husband Sam Mendes, best known for "American Beauty".

I really wanted to like this film, most people seem to. Once again I felt let down. I'm starting to think perhaps I'm being over critical of the films I've been viewing lately, I don't know. Yes, the subject matter/story was sad, but I know for the most part that had nothing to do with what I felt about the movie. I happen to like sad movies. They make me HAPPY! Well, the meds also help. :-)

This may sound strange to those of you who've seen it, but the acting and dialog seemed a little heightened to me, if that makes any sense. It wasn't necessarily over the top, just not quite "accurate". Perhaps because of the time period the film takes place. Please don't make me explain. I'm not even sure myself .

The highlight of the film for me was the character (I can't recall his name) played by Michael Shannon who is the schizophrenic son of an older couple (Kathy Bates as his mom in a small role). He's recently been released from a hospital & they've brought him for a visit as he's about Kate's & Leonardo's characters ages. Although he doesn't have the ability to filter properly and reason before he speaks, he's the only one who speaks their mind (bluntly) about what he sees around him. Sounds like me to some degree. I'd love to have a beer with this guy!

"My Name's Coraline, Not Caroline!"

This past weekend my buddy & me went to check out the stop motion animated film Coraline. We're both BIG fans of SM animated films like, "The Nightmare Before Christmas" & "Mad Monster Party?!", as well as all those R/B holiday TV specials, such as Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer.

SM is a relatively lost film making art which I'm glad is still produced once in a while. It's a time consuming, tedious, monotonous, nerve wracking process of moving a figure or object mere fractions of an inch, clicking off one or two frames of film until you have (hopefully) fluid movement. When I was a kid, my brother, friends, & me used to take my fathers (usually without permission) Super 8 camera to make our own lame SM films.

Coraline started out as a book written by Neil Gaiman whose mostly known for his arguably "classic" comic book work such as "Sandman". He's also known for producing tales such as "Stardust" which was recently made into a film. His most recent book, "The Graveyard Book", was released to much acclaim.

Coraline was adapted for the screen and directed by Henry Selick, A master of the modern day SM process. He previously directed the heralded films, "The Nightmare Before Christmas" for Tim Burton, and "James and The Giant Peach".

While I enjoyed the book, but more so the recent graphic novel, I felt a bit let down by the film (Don't yell at me Cate!). While the SM and 3-D processes were absolutely AMAZING, the story seemed to drag a bit. It saddened me. It was a visually beautiful film & the voice cast headed by Dakota Fanning and Terri Hatcher were excellent. I think the main reason for the letdown is the extreme hype some of these films are receiving.

Perhaps when it's released on DVD I'll enjoy it more, viewing it from the quiet comfort of the cemetery I call home.

Excuse me, but you seem to have something on your forehead...

Before I go any further, I'd like to stress that I'm a BIG believer in God & most things spiritual. That said, I'd like to share one of my silly gags I conduct on this day (Ash Wednesday), usually at work. Don't worry, it doesn't involve blood or 666! Perhaps I should start at the beginning...

Many years ago, during one particular day at work, I noticed one of my co-workers walking around HQ's with a dark smudge on his forehead. Being the thoughtful & conscientious person I am, I brought it to his attention. He scowled at me as he informed me it was Ash Wednesday.

OK, so noted. I'm not Catholic, but I certainly respect other peoples religious beliefs (albeit Satanists) even if I do not agree with, nor follow them. I'm a personal spiritual type guy that faded away from organized religion many years ago, although I do believe it has it's place, ESPECIALLY these days.

Anyway, my shtick is to approach those I see with the black smudge on their forehead as I pretend to lick my hand like your mom did when you had dirt on your face as a kid. Who knows, perhaps she still does it. Ah, Silvia. Natures Spic 'N Span or Mr. Clean if you will. Most people I do this to think it's somewhat funny &/or mildly amusing. Alas, the guy who punched me in the head apparently did NOT! Ouch! Nothing permanent I hope.

As an ending anecdote, one of our civilian African American or black employees was in the hall, & as I passed by she said I bet you can't see the ash on my forehead. SHE said this & with a smile, so please don't think me racist. I nearly peed my pants as I LOMAO walking back to my office.

Boy, I sure hope God has a sense of humor!

My NETFLIX Nights

Every once and a while I view a movie (I know very little about) that takes me completely by surprise. This particular film is Changeling. Staring Angelina Jolie as Christine Collins a strong but quiet single working mother whose son is apparently kidnapped when she agrees to cover a co-workers shift at the telephone company. I feel Jolie is one of the few current actors who's a true (old school) movie star in every sense of the word. Actually that's two words isn't it. She's both beautiful, graceful, and can usually & pretty much consistently act her ass off.

The film also stars a subtle John Malkovich as a crusading reverend who mistrusts and constantly challenges the LAPD through his radio show and the pulpit. Jeffery Donovan plays the part of a misguided and corrupt LAPD captain.

This is the first film in recent memory (aside from The Wrestler) that I've grappled emotionally with. Once this film took a hold of me, I was completely in! Rarely does a film strike so many emotional cords. I was angry, frustrated, heartbroken, elated, & I'm sure a few others that don't immediately come to mind. This film exhausted me! These are the films I live for. I don't care if it's good or bad emotions it plays on as long as I feel affected. THAT'S what I expect for my (rarely hard earned) $10.00!

When I review a film I try not to give away or rehash the plot which I'm sure most of you know by now. I'm usually only concerned with how it affects me. It's a VERY powerful thing when something as seemingly simple as a film affects you long after the lights have come up, you've relieved yourself after drinking too many liquids, and are settled in at your abode.

The film is directed by a very gifted Clint Eastwood, a classic Renaissance man. I'm so impressed with people who can wear so many hats & are talented in all the types of hats they wear. He's an actor of much notoriety, a writer, a musician, as well as a respected film director. I've not liked everything he's either acted in or directed, but I respect him a great deal.

The film is a period piece which is based on true events. The sets, costumes, and art direction are simply amazing. If you've not yet seen this gripping film, gettest thee to your blockbuster, brick & mortar store, or what have you, and view it. I think you'll be glad you did.

One final thing, aside from the deplorable police corruption, pieces of the film reminded me of another fine film set in LA involving the LAPD & that film is LA Confidential- if you enjoyed that, you'll probably dig this flick as well. Now shut up & pass the popcorn!

My Likes, Needs, & Wants.

OK- Here's a little game I found (stole) at Mental Vertigo (Stefany's blog), where it was apparently liberated (stolen) from The Cate Chronicles (Cate's blog- surprisingly).

How to play: Using a search engine (I prefer Google) type in your name followed by the word "needs". Click on the magic button & see what kinds of things you need that you weren't even aware you needed. I came up with some funny stuff, but I also took the liberty of also using the words likes & loves preceded by my name. There were many, I tried to pick the most entertaining (at least for me) ones. It's followed by my usual witty comentary! :-)

Christopher Needs:
- "Mods, after the mass firing of them"
- "A holiday" (definitely!)
- "A wee wee" (occasionally)
- "Tech support" (quite often)
- "A feeding" (when I'm hungry, sad, or stressed)
- "To fall in love" (without question!)
- "Major help" (well aware of this!)
- "A good ticking off" (I'm not sure what this means- sounds British- could be fun)
- "Your votes" (I'll let you know when I'm running for something)
- "A cyber doctor" (I'd prefer a real one on retainer)
- "You to fill in the blanks" (please don't do that)

Christopher Likes:
- "Smart girls" (very much, but not smarter than me!)
- "Teacher mom" (If she's hot I'll need some schoolin')
- "To take out the trash naked" (never!- well OK, once or twice)
- "Free stuff" (who doesn't like free stuff- if you're givin' I'm takin'!)
- "Everybody sort of" (but not too many)
- "To put bags on his feet" (only in Japan, or is that China?)
- "The fact that he can easily pick & choose activities" (sometimes not so easily done)
- "To arm wrestle" (only midgets & girls)
- "Party like a NOT star" (sadly, that would be me)


Christopher Loves:
- "BS" (as long as I'm dishin' it out!)
- "Dancing to songs" (only in private)
- "Trails, photos, & moose" (haven't been hiking or camping in quite a while)
- "Cats" (always & forever! They're cool & get a bad rap!)
- "Fitted T-Shirt" (not on my bod)
- "Us" (who would be us exactly?)
- "Foreign films" (most of the time unless the subtitles move too fast)
- "Drugs" (only the legal kind that make me happy!)
- "The fat boys" (only if it's a band & even then...)
- "His wife" (there was that time when I was drunk in Vegas...)
- "Hannah Montanna" (I don't want to go to jail at this point in my life- Thank you very much!)


This game kinda reminds me of the fortune cookie game. The one where you follow every fortune by "in bed". Getting back to Google (was I even there?) I'm convinced that whomever was attempting to come up with a name for the search engine (engine?) heard a baby trying to speak. They suddenly shouted Eureka!, that's it!

GAME OVER.

I Gave it The Office!

My home office is well on it's way. I suffered through some injuries & bleeding while attempting to assemble the file cabinet (see prior Ikea Insanity post), and with the help of a friend (is it a friend if you have to sign a contract & waiver as well as pay them?...hmm) we were able to complete the terrible task.

Then came the desk, which is much larger than the cabinet, but was infinitely easier to build, & I did it all by myself, I did- with nary a cut, bleeding, or bruising of any kind! Lastly I assembled the black wooden bankers chair that matches all the pieces. My only coordination appears to be in colors. The Macs set up & I'm almost open for business.

I just have to clear out the rest of the crap so I can actually get to the damn desk. The room I speak of used to be a second bedroom, which in turn became a showcase for my amassed pop culture collectibles, sadly devolving into a black hole where things are tossed. Once the door is shut, they don't exist! Come on, everybody has a room or closet like this in their place. If you don't, I can guarantee you eventually will. It's kinda like a GIANT junk drawer!

I actually hired two girls (no, they were neither geisha's nor hookers!) this past weekend to help me organize. We've been transporting all the crap from the office upstairs to my attic which is a good size with two rooms. Unfortunately now the attic has become the black hole on a grander scale! I've got a headache!

I'll just close the attic door and TA-DA, like magic, all the crap has disappeared! Wait, don't open the...............................................!

I'd Like To Thank The Academy

It's pretty much old news by now, especially for you movie fans, but I wanted to bring up the annual Academy Awards show. I was STUNNED when I realized this was the 81st Academy Awards presentation! Sadly, that's less than TWICE my age. I'd like to say it's MUCH more than that, but that would be lying, and lying is wrong, and as most of you are aware, I NEVER lie.............................or do I? ;^)

This years show was panned by critics as one of the worst & most boring in recent years. Surprisingly, (to me) I thought it was one of the better shows. Sure several of Hugh Jackmans musical numbers were somewhat trite & corny (again, to me), but for the most part the show kept me entertained during it's 20 hour presentation. Jackman showed he had other talents besides his acting chops. I think most people are unaware of his singing & dancing abilities.

I think the audience (actors & actresses) were glad to see a peer hosting, but what do I know. It was nice, (although I'm not much of a fan) that the Academy honored Jerry Lewis for his work in the entertainment industry, as well as his humanitarian efforts. Whether I like him him or not, I respect the contributions he's made in both area's. I was surprised by the small contingency of protesters against his tributary honor.

Regardless of whether or not you felt Heath Ledger deserved a posthumous best supporting actor award (& there was plenty of controversy), I thought he did a fine job in The Dark Knight, and it was nice that his father, mother, and sister accepted the award on his behalf, dedicating it to his daughter Matilda (love that name by the way). I was surprised that Michelle Williams was not up on stage as well, but I'm sure she had her reasons.

Just in case you did not view the show, nor read the results in the newspaper etc., I'm gonna list the achievements for any who may be interested. There weren't many surprises, and Slumdog Millionaire pretty much swept the awards show as I predicted, and for the most part agreed with the wins. To quote Heath Ledger as the Joker in TDK- "And here we go"!

BEST PICTURE- "Slumdog Millionaire" (pretty much deserved)
BEST ACTOR- Sean Penn, "Milk" (somewhat political speech- thankfully kept to a minimum)
BEST ACTRESS- Kate Winslet, "The Reader" (have not seen film- deserved- it's about time!)
DIRECTOR- Danny Boyle, "SDM" (amazing multiple genre director)
SUPPORTING ACTOR- Heath Ledger, "The Dark Knight"
SUPPORTING ACTRESS- Penelope Cruz, "Vicky Cristina Barcelona"
ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY- Dustin Black, "Milk" (first timer?)
ADAPTED SCREENPLAY- Simon Beaufoy, "SDM"
ANIMATED FEATURE- "WALL-E" (big surprise-NOT!)
BEST DOCUMENTARY- "Man on Wire" (Great!)
ART DIRECTION- "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button"
VISUAL EFFECTS- "Benjamin Button"
SOUND MIXING- "SDM"
CINEMATOGRAPHY- "SDM"
ORIGINAL SCORE- "SDM"
ORIGINAL SONG- "Jai Ho," "SDM" (Meh-not many song choices this year)
FILM EDITING- "SDM"
SOUND EDITING- "TDK" (Hooray!- One's better than none)

Surprised & a bit disappointed "The Wrestler" did not fare well.


HIGHLIGHTS:
-Kate Winslets speech- "Let me tell you, winning is a lot better than losing. A lot better."

- Ben Stillers hilarious parody of Joaquin Phoenix's recent silliness!

-Heath Ledgers family accepting his best supporting actor award.

Banding Together

FINALLY came up with a name for the band which we all seem to be agreeable on, or I should say was the best one (so far) of all the lame names the guys were coming up with.

The name of the band is.......*drum roll please*......"Playback". Which kinda makes sense as we're a cover band and tend to play all songs not too recent. As I'm sure most of you know, the term playback refers to hearing what you've just recorded, or more importantly (as far as I'm concerned) the title to Tom Petty's box set that was released several years ago.

Dear Blog.......

I'm presuming ( I don't like ASSuming because of the saying) that most, if not all the people reading my blog have blogs of their own as part of the cult community that is Blogger.

 I was thinking about the reasons why I do this. One of the main reasons being the financial reward! The other is I tend to be lazy, but I enjoy writing and blogging is for the most part easy and it appeals to my need for instant gratification. I also like to humor and entertain the masses which I'm not so sure I'm successful at.

As strange as it may sound, by blogging I kinda feel like this is a place I can come (& sorta) feel like I belong and am a part of something. Of course I've been known to be delusional from time to time. This is like my cyber-bar where I'm usually, OK sometimes, sober and nobody really knows my name. Kinda the antithesis of cheers!

So why do you blog? I'd truly like to know. Leave a comment (or two) and explain thyself!

WEIRD & STRANGE but TRUE!

This is a good one!

So I'm at work when I hear my name over the police radio, which is quite unusual these days. Then I hear my name being called over the PA system, this is somewhat unusual. Then the phone in my office rings, which IS quite common.

It's the dispatch center, who've been trying to reach me because they received a complaint of a naked man in the cemetery (where I live-really!), running around and rolling in the dirt. It took me several moments until I was convinced they weren't kidding- The whole payback thing and all. Actually I think the only reason they were trying to contact me was because they wanted to make sure I wasn't the naked guy!

Turns out a citizen was visiting a grave when they observed a young Hispanic man garbed in only his birthday suit, frolicking among the dearly departed. Several units arrived at the scene, along with the rescue squad. They wrapped him up in a blanket while attempting to ascertain his identity. He apparently had a cell phone on his person (I don't even want to think about where he was keeping it!) which the authorities used to contact the naked mans family- hope they were wearing rubber gloves!

The guy was packed up in the ambulance and shipped off to a local hospital for observation. I haven't read the official reports yet, but unsurprisingly he was quite disoriented, not quite aware of who he was, and where he was. I was told he was trying to find Jesus. I wasn't aware Jesus was lost. He can't get lost anyway, he has a GPS system! The guy might have had better luck at a church then at a cemetery!

All this excitement in my own backyard! You can't make this stuff up. True story- Swear to the big G!

VD (don't read into that) PLAYLIST

Valentine's day, shmalentine's day. Buy yourself a box of chocolates and a Bottle of wine, and download these LOVEless songs.

1) "Broken Hearts Are for ---holes" Frank Zappa

2) "Love Stinks"- J. Geils Band

3) "The Breakup Song"- Greg Kihn

4) "You Oughta Know"- Alanis Morissette

5) "Baby's in Black"/"For No One"- The Beatles

6) "What Do I get?"- The Buzzcocks

7) "You Got Lucky"- Tom Petty & the Heartbreakers

8) "I Will Survive"- Gloria Gaynor

9) "These Boots Were Made For Walking"- Nancy Sinatra

10) "I Used To Love Her"- Guns N' Roses

11) Bonus Track- "All By Myself"- Eric Carmen

I don't endorse, nor necessarily like every tune listed, but some 'taint bad at all. Do you have any miserable, sad, or love gone wrong tunes to add to the list? Do tell!

Happy Saturday Day!

I'm sorry, I was just informed it was actually Valentines Day, and in honor of this special day of amor (is there an e at the end?) , I wrote a poem I'd like to share with you.

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I think today sucks

Perhaps you do too

OXOX

The word sucks may seem a bit harsh, and if it offends I somewhat apologize. In all seriousness however, if you do have a sweetie, a wife, a husband, heck even a mother or father, tell them you LOVE them, especially if you rarely say it. I wish all you love birds a very special and romantic day. On that note I'd like to add, try not to kill each other!

Happy Friday The 13th!

Unless of course your highly superstitious, then there's not much I can offer in the way of comfort. Hopefully most, if not all of you, made it through the day basically unscathed........or did you?

Keeping Comments Current- Say That 3 Times Fast!

I know of no way (does anyone?) to be alerted to new comments on older posts, and do not wish to miss any. My hope and desire is that if anyone comments on an older post, you would be so kind as to place said comment in the most recent post and refer it to which ever older post the comment is for- THANKS!

Did that actually make any comprehensible sense to anyone?!

The Wrestler

Have you ever seen a one trick pony in the field so happy and free

If you've seen a one trick pony then you've seen me

Have you ever seen a one legged dog makin' his way down the street

If you've ever seen a one legged dog then you've seen me

*CHORUS*

Then you've seen me- I come and stand at every door

Then you've seen me- I always leave with less than I had before

Then you've seen me- but I can make you smile when the blood it hits the floor

Tell me friend can you ask for anything more

Tell me friend can you ask for anything more

Have you ever seen a scarecrow filled with nothing but dust and weeds

If you've ever seen that scarecrow then you've seen me

Have you ever seen a one armed man punchin' at nothing but the breeze

If you've ever seen a one armed man then you've seen me

*REPEAT CHORUS*

THESE THINGS THAT HAVE COMFORTED ME I DRIVE AWAY

This place that is my home I cannot stay

My only faith is in the broken bones and bruises I display

Have you ever seen a one legged man tryin' to dance his way free

If you've ever seen a one legged man then you've seen me

BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN

"THE WRESTLER"

For No One

Your day breaks, your mind aches
You find that all her words of kindness
linger on when she no longer needs you

She wakes up, she makes up
She takes her time and doesn't feel
she needs to hurry she no longer
needs you

*CHORUS*
And in her eyes you see nothing
No sign of love behind the tears
cried for no one
A love that should have lasted years

You want her, you need her
and yet you don't believe her when
she says her love is dead you think
she needs you

*REPEAT CHORUS*

You stay home, she goes out
She says that long ago she knew
someone but now he's gone
She doesn't need him

Your day breaks, your mind aches
There will be times when all the
things she said will fill your head
You won't forget her.

*REPEAT CHORUS*


THE BEATLES
"REVOLVER"

Blood, Sweat, & Tears (almost)

In an earlier post I mentioned the Ikea Insanity I endured. Several days later, apparently a glutton for punishment, I returned to purchase a desk and file cabinet. Ironically the box that held the contents of the file cabinet was much smaller, yet MUCH heavier than the desk. Go figure. A few days had passed, and I felt slightly motivated and ready to tackle the assembly of the file cabinet.

I opened the box only to have about 4,522,000 parts cascade onto the floor. Oh no, I thought, here we go. I took a deep breath and grabbed the instructions and what I found didn't surprise me in the least. Several pages of diagrams (with no words) that made very little sense, much like me on a stage as a male stripper!

I held my head high and told myself, Self- you can do this by God! So summoning every nerve of steel I possessed, I commenced assembly. First and foremost I made sure every piece of fake Ikea wood was included. Next I counted the 103 pieces of hardware which took about 40 minutes. I was cookin' with gas now baby! Step 1- done. Step 2- go on with yo bad self. Step-3......Step-3! WTF?! Where the hellarky (WV) do these drawer rails go?! The damned instructions made very little sense to my by then feeble mind. I read the instructions sideways, standing on my head, and by candlelight, and I still couldn't figure it out- SOB! My head hurt. I was tired and frustrated. I was done!

After a few days of accidentally slamming my feet and stubbing my toes on the pieces of unbuilt fake wood file cabinet pieces, I decided it was time to try again, but this time I would send out an SOS. I lit a fire on the front lawn and waited. And waited- and waited, until finally the Calvary arrived- or in actuality, my friend Steve.

Last time Steve helped, and this is no slight on him, I received four stitches to my finger. This time would be no different. Coincidence or supernatural occurrence- who knows? After about two hours, a screwdriver into the soft flesh of my left hand between the thumb and pointer finger, as well as a deep slice (from one of the metal drawer rails) opening up the side of the finger to the right of my pinky finger (left hand as well), quite a bit of blood, and several Band-Aids, we were finished.

I haven't even built the desk yet- sheesh!

Have You Ever Seen a One Trick Pony.....

"I'm an old broken down piece of meat, and I deserve to be all alone."

I recently had the pleasure of viewing The Wrestler, written by Robert Siegel and directed by Darren Aronofsky (Requiem for a dream/The Fountain). While I enjoyed it, it was one of those films that I enjoyed even more in retrospect.

It stars Mickey Rourke (9 1/2 Weeks), along with Marisa Tomei (My Cousin Vinney) and Evan Rachel Wood (The Upside of Anger/Across The Universe). It has already won several awards, and has received several Academy nods as well.

The basic premise is a story about a wrestler (Rourke) past his prime trying to stage a comeback (Rocky-underdog), despite having survived a recent heart attack. He's an admirer from a distance of a stripper (Tomei). Two lost souls past their prime. Seemingly out of quiet desperation and loneliness, he seeks out to win her heart, which out of fear and guarded tenacity she holds back. These same reasons motivate him to attempt a reconnection with his estranged daughter (Wood).

The film, mostly filmed in and around the great state of NJ, is shot in a gritty style that reminded me of films from the 70's. The color palette of the film is muted and bleak conveying the characters lives and situations, although in NJ's defence, most of the locations do not accurately convey much of the beauty that is "The Garden State".

While there is much heartache in the film, there are several glimmers of hope and joy. Hope that it's not too late for love. Hope that it's not too late to make up for past mistakes. Hope for second chances and dying dreams, and a hope that there's still hope.

On a personal level, there were several scenes that deeply affected me, tearing at hardened layers of my heart and soul. Although far from a wrestler (although I did wrestle briefly in junior high), I could identify with the feeling that perhaps my best days are behind me. That some of my past mistakes can no longer be repaired and that hope is somewhat waning. The scenes of the the wrestler attempting to reconnect with his daughter stung as I recalled my own fathers attempts to rekindle and reconnect with me. My hope for forgiveness for a father who abandoned me, unrealized before he died and it was too late.

My favorite scene in the film, however subtle, was when desperate for more hours at the grocery store where he worked, he took on the new position of butcher. As he makes his way to the butcher counter on the first day of his new job,  the camera follows him in a long shot. Faintly heard in the background is the roar of the crowd, until he finally emerges at the counter to unseen cheers and applause. A great scene and powerful stuff, at least for me.

Perhaps you've already seen the film or are planning to. Go, and afterwards let it wrestle and grapple (clever puns intended) around in your thoughts, and please comment here. I'd like to know your thoughts and opinions.

 

A Preposterous Pondering To Ponder

"Each handicap is like a hurdle in a steeplechase, and when you ride up to it, if you throw your heart over, the horse will go along, too."

-Lawrence Bixby

Bills brother? Does anyone know who this is before I have to google his name?

Actually, (I write that word a lot) that quote to ponder is not particularly preposterous nor ponderous is it. In fact it's kinda nice, so ponder away.

IR&R Part III!

Worst Buy!

Once again I apparently JUST DON'T GET IT! So there I am at Best Buy (a necessary evil in my life) attempting to purchase the Robert Plant/Alison Krauss CD (Raising Sand) and looking around the store. Granted it's midday, but There is only one line with one cashier, and it's almost at a standstill! All I want is one lousy (hopefully not-I've heard good things) CD! Are we not in a recession? Do they want us lowly consumers to purchase goods from their evil den of retaility? I see several employees standing around, but can they see fit to open another register to keep their customers happy? Apparently not! Too much work.

As I've mentioned MANY times, I'm not a very patient man. I tried not to make a scene. I'm a very passionate person. I dramatically (well, not really) placed the CD down. Quietly muttered some advise to pass on to the manager to one of the standing around employees and left.

Yes, they most likely didn't care. Yes, they most likely found me quite amusing, and yes I left empty handed, and yes I'll be returning in the next couple of days (in disguise of course) with my tail between my legs, but the disc is a bargain at 10 bucks! Ahhrrrggg!

Top Ten (or less) Favorite Drummers List!

In an earlier post I wrote up several favorite top ten (less or more) lists, but for some reason neglected to include favorite drummers. I'd like to take this moment to rectify that if I may. These musicians are not in any particular order. Some of them arguably underrated, but as far as I'm concerned skilled and very influential on me as a drummer and my style of playing!

Drum roll (get it?) please....................

1) Ringo Starr (Beatles/solo artist)
2) Keith Moon (The Who)
3) Stan Lynch (original Petty & HB's drummer)
4) Stewart Copeland (The Police, of course!)
5) Max Weinberg (Springsteen/Conan O' Brian show) our playing styles are similar.
6) Don Henley (Eagles/solo artist)
7) Phil Collins (Genesis/solo artist)

8) Mick Fleetwood

9) The kid from the Partridge Family 

10) Abe Lincolns sister Louise

OK,  I'm just kiddin' about the last two. When I finally wake up, hopefully I'll come up with some more names...............or not!

My Favorite Number!

Hooray- I've gotz me 12 kind souls that check out my blog. 12 just happens to be my favorite number, although I'm not exactly sure why. If I recall correctly it had to do with my first hero in life "Broadway Joe" Namath. He donned the number 12 jersey for the NY Jets back in the day. I'm glad to have you guys around, although instead of followers, (which sounds a bit creepy) it should be friends, buddies, or pals.........or nothin'.

I hope you guys aren't raising your rates. The checks will be in the post tomorrow-Really!

"It Was Twenty (& More) Years ago Today......................

Growing up I had an older sister who turned me on to the music she would often play around the house. She was a classic "teenie bopper", and as this was the late 60's, early 70's, much of the music she listened to was produced by groups like, The Beatles, The Monkees, Herman's Hermits, and bubble gum music of that ilk. She'd be-bop around the house, and I grew to love those tunes as it was drummed into my head during my early formative years. She brain washed me I tell ya! 

I apparently took to drumming quite naturally. It was the perfect instrument for a kid ensconced in ADHD, before it became trendy & hip! As I became more proficient at drumming, I would often play along to the records laying around. Most of these albums (do you know what these are kids?) were by The Beatles, and that's basically how I learned to play drums, and to develop a love and devotion for The Beatles, albeit mostly early stuff. I even eventually joined a Beatle sound-alike group. We were pretty good for our age, obsessed with figuring out how to play our instruments exactly like them. We even played the same type.

Eventually I kinda grew away from The Beatles as I became aware of the many bands and types of music beyond The Beatles that existed in the world. Even up to recently, though still a big fan, I had lost some interest in their "dated" tunes. Then the other day I popped in the first DVD (1 & 2) of the 10 part Beatles Anthology that was released back in '02. I've had it sitting on a shelf, always promising myself I would eventually watch it. Well that blessed day had come my friends! So far I've watched discs 1 through 8, with just the one disc of special features left to view. Each part is a little over an hour. I have to say I've embraced Beatlemania once again! The anthology is an amazing documentary which is very informative and quite candid, with tons of behind the scenes information. Ah, so that's what really happened..........................

Without even realizing it I had just started watching it just prior to today's anniversary. Today is the 45th (WOW!) anniversary of the Beatles arrival in America. During that time they played The Ed Sullivan show twice, as well as a gig in Washington DC.

My fanship has been restored! I love them YEAH-YEAH-YEAH!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RJW!

Ladies and Gentleman- You know her, you love her, so let's wish Rennie a very HB! Even if you don't know her, wish her a HB! At her age they mean more!

Ren, have a very special day! Wish I could help you celebrate. I miss you very much................sometimes..........ocassionally...........perhaps once in a while, every other Friday, except leap year!

Green Gangstas

The other night we had a car jacking. The event literally happened right around the corner from where I live. This is only the second jacking I'm aware of that occurred in my town. Apparently two "bruthas" came upon a guy getting out of his car, and stole it at gun point. I think it may have been an opportunistic crime as there were no other cars in the area. Personally I think it was two guys who were tired of walking and just happened to have a gun in their possession. I have yet to read the official reports.

A crime such as this is (was) rare in the town I live and happen to work in. This town stinks of money baby! The town is mixed and diversified, but still mostly populated with "crackas". I would in fact be one, although I'd like to think I have a bit of brutha in me and have been told by several folks of color on many occasions.

 The story only gets better!

The car they stole was..................................a Prius! They fled the scene heading East, eventually ending up in Elizabeth NJ, a few towns over. Not the nicest place. It appeared they were gonna switch that car up for another car that was pimped out and tricked out! Unfortunately this car belonged to an off-duty Elizabeth cop! And so the story ends. In fact they'll probably have the book thrown at 'em! Get it? Book? Story? People, if I have to explain it, it's not funny!

Fortuitous Vacation

A friend of mine was planning to go to Europe this week with a friend, but due to an unforeseen emergency her friend had to bail, so she offered me a free ticket. So I'm off to Europe for a week. Not sure when or if I'll be able to blog. Perhaps I'll have a brief moment to post from one of those Internet cafe places, unless of course I'm having too much fun.

If truth be told, I WILL be on vacation (really), but sadly spending it on the Isle of Jersey. I couldn't leave the country anyway. Last year the judge made me turn over my passport because he felt I was a flight risk. I told him that that was ridiculous, and that he was a silly, silly judge.

...............................................................I don't really want to talk about it.

I is for Integrity

Recently I've been courted by some major National corporations that want to sponsor my humble little blog, FLAST. While it would mean quite a bit of supplemental revenue, I feel it would take away from the simple hometown feel that I've worked so hard to develop.

I feel very loyal to my regular readers who are apparently pretty bored and have quite a bit of time on their hands. I feel that if I allowed "the man" in, there would be no turning back, and I'd be selling out. I'd rather give up a generous paycheck then lose my readership.



I'm still hoping it's not too late to work through my pathological lying issues through intensive therapy.

Word Verification Fun!

I must be bored as I've truly been enjoying the words the folks at Blogger come up with that you must type in the little box in order to have high priority security clearance just to leave a comment.

Who actually picks these words? It is a part time position for a little old lady in retirement to make a few extra bucks on the side? I suspect it's more likely an evil government run automated system, much like the department of defence computer as seen in the film War Games. "Want to play a (word verification) game?"

I'm not exactly sure of the point of it all. On most sites, such as Craig's List, the WV word is almost impossible to read! Can someone out there in cyberspace enlighten me............................or not.

If you find yourself as bored as I usually am, when you leave a comment post the WV & make up your own definition for the word. It's fun kids, and we'll be starting a new trend at Blogger that may have repercussions felt around the globe.......................or not.

So play along won't you (some of you already have to my delight) you'll be glad you did, and you'll find a gentle peace and serenity overcome you to the point where you may fall asleep. Actually that probably happens by simply reading my posts!

One other thing, I just wanted to thank EVERYONE whose kind enough to follow my humble blog &/or those that occasionally leave the mysterious or anonymous comment. It truly means a lot.

Name The Band Contest

I need everybody's help- PLEASE!

My band is experiencing GREAT difficulty in coming up with a clever, memorable band name. ANY suggestions? We could really use your help. The only information I can offer is, It's 4 guys- ages 40 to 49- who play lame cover tunes, mostly from the 60's, 70's, and 80's.

Whoever's band name suggestion is chosen, wins absolutely nothing, but the satisfaction of helping out their fellow man. That should give you a warm, fuzzy feeling, which is much more satisfying and fulfilling then any amount of ca$h or prize!

Come on now, sharpen those minds and #2 pencils and lets get crackin'!

For Better or For Worse

" A great marriage is not when the 'perfect couple' comes together. It is when when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences."

-Dave Meurer

That's very nice and insightful, but apparently Mr. Meurer (whoever he is) is a confirmed bachelor, like me!

WEIRD but TRUE!

A Los Angeles couple has raised a cabbage patch doll as their only son for 19 years. The doll, named Kevin, goes everywhere with Pat and Joe Posey and they talk to him, with Joe replying as the voice of Kevin. Kevin has his own playroom, toy Corvette, pet dog, full wardrobe and $3,000 college fund.

"With every kid that you adopt, you promise to love them and be a good parent and take care of this child. He's easy going, quiet and well behaved," says Pat, who adds that she and her husband prefer Kevin to their real-life daughter.

Quiet and well behaved?! Apparently Pat and Joe excelled in bad parenting 101. Perhaps they even have Master degrees! I can't even begin to imagine how their "real-life" daughter is gonna turn out.

Folks, you can't make this stuff up- no sir!

Super Bowl Bonanza!

Did you (meaning absolutely anyone) watch the Big game? Did you even care? Me not so much, although I basically just wanted to see Springsteen's 1/2 time show which I felt was a tad bit lame, and I'm a big fan.

Did you pig-out whilst watching the passing of the pigskin? My unusual environment was a strangers very BIG house, with my two gay (male) friends. The host happened to be a very nice lesbian gym teacher (I don't mean to stereo-type, but tis true). I told her not to be concerned with an additional (heterosexual) male in the room, as I've always felt I had an inner lesbian that I was finally getting in touch with, and fully ready to embrace!

I think the only things missing were a Mexican wrestler and a black circus clown midget. I felt like a pretty open minded person. I ate their food and split after the 1/2 time show. This is a TRUE story. Only the names have been changed to protect the guilty, which is most likely me!

WEIRD but TRUE!

A fifth-grade girl's family thought she was nuts when she talked about an imaginary friend's body being buried beneath their Columbus, Ga., home- until the family was remodeling the house and found child's bones under the floor boards.

Stephanie Ogden insisted a friendly black girl in a white dress visited her room and said, "Somebody put her in the floor...He chopped her up''- a tale the family had chalked up to childhood imagination.

"I'm not a psychic, and I don't believe in some of that stuff. But I believe this is a soul who has not been put to rest," said Stephanie's great-grand-mother, Marion. Police are investigating.

Ooh, spooooky!

Somebody Throw Me A Life Preserver!

Apparently, I sunk to the very bottom of the (Super Bowl) pool. Nope, didn't win a thing. Zip-zilch-nill- & nadda! Better luck next year. I knew I shoulda went with Tiger Woods for crap sake!

IR&R Part II

IKEA INSANITY!

I drove out to Ikea yesterday because I've been searching for over a year now for the "perfect" black wood desk. They had a few new desks on-line that looked promising, but I'd have to see them in person. I need a desk especially now because of my iMac, (impending) exterior speaker sound system, and for all the work I'll be doing editing the films I make.

I don't have a lot of space to work within my apartment, so I required a smaller sized desk. Not too big, nor too small, and MOST importantly it had to be affordable. Pottery Barn has had some really nice desks I've had my eyes on- waiting for a decent sale which never seems to come. PB = VERY overpriced!



So I finally arrive at Ikea which is mobbed with people that apparently have NO money (Please see prior IR&R post) to spend due to the state of the economy. If you've ever been to an Ikea store, it's quite the experience let me tell ya, especially when it's crowded. On the floor are painted arrows that guide you through each department, eventually forcing you to see other stuff you may not want or need. Evil upscale subliminal forced impulse shopping- like the candy at the register, but on a much LARGER scale!

I was furious! I only wanted to go to the office furniture section, but there was no way to bypass all the other stuff. I figured there must be hidden short cuts, but I guess only the employees know where they are. I figured the store would be empty as it was Super Bowl Sunday, but instead I had to dodge and weave through all the slow moving Swedish meatballs in order to arrive at my destination. I felt like the Swedish Chef (Muppet Show) playing in the Super Bowl!

I eventually found the desk I saw on-line, looks pretty nice even though it's Ikea's crappy particle board fake wood! They also had a nice file cabinet that rolls underneath. On another desk I saw a monitor riser that matched, I'll take 'em all!

Some dude at a computer station printed out my desk desires, and I was off. The desk and file cabinet I'd have to retrieve from the main furniture pick up area. The monitor stand I'd have to locate in the self-service area. I went to the section the guy said the monitor riser was, walking back and forth like a crazed man (trying to kick a bad nicotine habit), attempting to locate the numbers and matching pic on the shelves.

I'm always sure I'm gonna buy the incorrect one. Ah, here it.............. isn't?! It was just a board? A lousy Ikea particle plank?! Where was the hardware? I finally found a (cranky-like me) guy and I tried to explain my dilemma. He said they kept the hardware for the board in a different area, adding that the 4 legs that attach to the board were not in stock. Now I was really furious. OK, I'm not getting that!

I took my print outs over to the furniture pickup area where the lady informed me I had to go through the check out first. Silly me, I thought I could take care of it there. I turned around and all I saw were lines. Miles and miles of lines! I had a minor meltdown. I couldn't take it anymore. I was a broken man. Sweden 1- USA 0!

I left the store with NOTHIN'!, not even a meatball. I walked the three miles back to my car and left utterly defeated. I vowed to return for another match. I'm sure the stuff'll be out of stock by then. That's OK, I can never read Ikea's assembly instructions anyway. Seems like they're in every language but English!

I'm down, but not out.

The Walmart Incident

I'm not a big fan of the Big W. I guess that kinda makes me a snob, but hey, with the economy the way it is, I'll slum it, but I'll have to wear a disguise. Actually I wasn't there to purchase. I was there to return.

I stood in line watching some "sista" spewing profanities at the employees like Linda Blair at an exorcism! She threatened them saying she would call her husband (poor guy) and have him take care of business.

As I've said before I'm not a particularly patient man, so I started to get fidgety. Then came the heavy sighs, followed by the silent under my breath mutterings known only to me. Anyone else hearing it would probably suspect I'm speaking in tongues! I dramatically rolled my eyes as I looked down at the floor. WTF?! Is that money on the floor?! Is it a dollar? NO, it's ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS! Yes!

Like a rabid squirrel hording nuts for the winter, I instinctively and quickly bent over and snatched it up before anyone knew what happened. I began to shake and tremble as my hands grew clammy. I broke into a light sweat above my brow as well. Run for it I thought, run for the hills! Fly young sparrow. For craps sake, beat feet my friend! The hell with the return. Keep it AND the money and your WAY ahead of the game my fine felonious fellow.

Oh no, the horns began to recede like my hairline, and that bent halo was beginning to appear, albeit more crooked than usual. I figured it had to be somebody within close proximity as I would have noticed it earlier. It must have just fallen out of someones pocket. If I ask everyone if they're missing $100 dollars, of course everyone is going to say yes!

I asked the guy directly in front of me if he was missing any money, to which he thankfully replied no. That's one down, one to go. That's when I made the mistake of asking the guy at the counter if he was missing any ca$hola. With that he reached into his (empty) pocket and said, yes-I'm missing a hundred dollars. Aw nuts! It was either a really good guess or it did in fact belong to him. He was so glad I found it and gave it back to him. I must have restored his faith in humanity because he gave it back to me and told me to keep it! Actually he didn't.

I felt kinda good. I know I did the right thing in returning the money. Don't get me wrong, I hesitated as my mind raced, cha-ching! I know if I lost it, I'd like someone to return it to me. Perhaps some good Karma is headed my way, perhaps not. It's OK though, because as I was leaving I stole his wallet which had much more ca$h in it then the $100.00!

Who Wants To Be A Millionaire?

Last night I had the pleasure of seeing Slumdog Millionaire. All I can say is WOW! Now I understand what all the hoopla's about. This ambitious indie film received several well deserved Academy nods. I'm sure it will do very well, if not completely sweep the awards show.

It was directed by Danny Boyle who commands more and more respect after each of his films I see. Here's a very talented director who apparently prefers to work on smaller films (greater control perhaps & not beholden to the Hollywood studio system?). I've never known of a director aside from the much more well known Spielberg, whose worked in so many different genres.

He broke with Trainspotting, and from there moved onto films that ran the gamut of horror to family. Slumdog being somewhat (although not for kids) in the latter. This is the man who produced one of my favorite horror films 28 Days Later, also co-producing it's sequel (which I also enjoyed). He also produced Millions, a lighter film with a sweet heartfelt story.

I'm not going to explain the story of Slumdog except to say it takes place in India, and it's main themes seem to be about love, hope, and perseverance. His films ultimately deal with the human spirit and condition regardless of region or culture. This film simultaneously broke and warmed my heart. Although I felt the ending was mildly cliched, I felt for the most part the film lived up to the hype.

If you've not seen it, make the effort not to miss it. It's been playing at my local (way too small) movie house that contains one moderate sized theatre, along with three much smaller ones. We saw it in the smaller (& worst) of the four. It's been playing there for over a month now. That's unheard of these days, so that certainly says something about the popularity of this film.

Also showing at this movie house were; Doubt, The Wrestler, and Revolutionary Road. This theatre owner must be making a fortune. There was a line down the block, with traffic in the area practically at a standstill. I've not seen this since the 70's and 80's when most theatres had only one screen. Ah, those were the days.