IR&R Part II

IKEA INSANITY!

I drove out to Ikea yesterday because I've been searching for over a year now for the "perfect" black wood desk. They had a few new desks on-line that looked promising, but I'd have to see them in person. I need a desk especially now because of my iMac, (impending) exterior speaker sound system, and for all the work I'll be doing editing the films I make.

I don't have a lot of space to work within my apartment, so I required a smaller sized desk. Not too big, nor too small, and MOST importantly it had to be affordable. Pottery Barn has had some really nice desks I've had my eyes on- waiting for a decent sale which never seems to come. PB = VERY overpriced!



So I finally arrive at Ikea which is mobbed with people that apparently have NO money (Please see prior IR&R post) to spend due to the state of the economy. If you've ever been to an Ikea store, it's quite the experience let me tell ya, especially when it's crowded. On the floor are painted arrows that guide you through each department, eventually forcing you to see other stuff you may not want or need. Evil upscale subliminal forced impulse shopping- like the candy at the register, but on a much LARGER scale!

I was furious! I only wanted to go to the office furniture section, but there was no way to bypass all the other stuff. I figured there must be hidden short cuts, but I guess only the employees know where they are. I figured the store would be empty as it was Super Bowl Sunday, but instead I had to dodge and weave through all the slow moving Swedish meatballs in order to arrive at my destination. I felt like the Swedish Chef (Muppet Show) playing in the Super Bowl!

I eventually found the desk I saw on-line, looks pretty nice even though it's Ikea's crappy particle board fake wood! They also had a nice file cabinet that rolls underneath. On another desk I saw a monitor riser that matched, I'll take 'em all!

Some dude at a computer station printed out my desk desires, and I was off. The desk and file cabinet I'd have to retrieve from the main furniture pick up area. The monitor stand I'd have to locate in the self-service area. I went to the section the guy said the monitor riser was, walking back and forth like a crazed man (trying to kick a bad nicotine habit), attempting to locate the numbers and matching pic on the shelves.

I'm always sure I'm gonna buy the incorrect one. Ah, here it.............. isn't?! It was just a board? A lousy Ikea particle plank?! Where was the hardware? I finally found a (cranky-like me) guy and I tried to explain my dilemma. He said they kept the hardware for the board in a different area, adding that the 4 legs that attach to the board were not in stock. Now I was really furious. OK, I'm not getting that!

I took my print outs over to the furniture pickup area where the lady informed me I had to go through the check out first. Silly me, I thought I could take care of it there. I turned around and all I saw were lines. Miles and miles of lines! I had a minor meltdown. I couldn't take it anymore. I was a broken man. Sweden 1- USA 0!

I left the store with NOTHIN'!, not even a meatball. I walked the three miles back to my car and left utterly defeated. I vowed to return for another match. I'm sure the stuff'll be out of stock by then. That's OK, I can never read Ikea's assembly instructions anyway. Seems like they're in every language but English!

I'm down, but not out.