Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh........
Here I sit foggy, groggy, punch drunk, & slightly delirious. I overslept AGAIN!! All night long I was in & out of consciousness. I woke up (sorta) when I heard the first of my 9 emergency alarms go off.
I had a few of the alarms custom built. They cost quite a bit of moo-la to produce. They're manufactured by some old guy who works out of a small shed in Alaska. One of the alarms is a police/fire type siren. Another is a fog horn. I even have one that violently shakes the bed. I don't wish to discuss the others.
I don't even remember falling back asleep. When that happens I usually fall into a deeeeep sleep & dream quite intensely. Somewhere deep inside the shallow recesses of my mind I must of realized I had to wake up because I suddenly awoke with my heart & mind racing, feeling like I was hit by a bus! It felt almost like an intense hangover minus the booze.
Thank God I have my elephant assistant typing this for me. It's quite convenient as she works for peanuts! I also have a back up monkey just in case who works for...well as if you didn't know. I'm feeling quite useless today, so I'll probably get less work done that I usually do. It's gonna be a lonnng day!
Bartender- no more for me. I think I had too much to dream last night!
About Me
- C. Louis Wolfe
- I'm a SWM, rapidly approaching middle age, also known as "manopause". Born to parents I never knew. I've recently become aware that I am one of six twins, scattered throughout the world. I'm damn good looking for my age, and live like a king! Destined to die alone, unless I'm able to finally find a woman unstable enough to deal with my stuff. Including some issues, back issues, and a somewhat lightweight carry on, that now costs $15.00 if you want to check it!
4 comments:
I NEVER have trouble sleeping. Everyone I know does...
It takes me about 3-5 minutes to fall asleep. And I, too, fall into deeeep sleep. Nothing wakes me up (loud thunderstorm, television, peole crying out "STEFANY!", lizard scratching on tank, the howling of coyotes in the back yard...)
God damn typo! I HATE that...
Watch your mouth young lady! This is a family friendly blog for $h!t$ sake! Do you kiss your mama w/that mouth? Open wide I gotz a bar of soap headed your way sister!
With your sleeping abilities I sure hope your house never catches on fire!
My college roommate used to put her alarm clock on the other side of the room, so she'd HAVE to get up to turn it off. Once she was out of bed, she stayed out of bed.
I have a bad habit of waking up around an hour before my alarm clock goes off. Five a.m. seems to be my natural wake-up time even though I don't have to be up then.
I have the Stephen Fry talking alarm clock. It's his Jeeves voice and quite hilarious. http://www.voco.uk.com/
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